The date is August 9, 2023.
Just another Wednesday.
My amazing wife had requested Chicken Tenders Lyon days ago.
I love when she does that.
It's one of those simple little things that makes our four decade marriage special. I love that she loves my food enough to ask for specific dishes. It makes me happy to hear her make yummy noises at the dinner table.
Not today she didn't...
No... today she politely said the dish was not so bad when I know full well I destroyed it. I can't even go into how many steps went wrong because I'm so upset, and honestly... the details don't really matter.
Now mind you... this is a dish I have made numerous times, and it has always been a winner. Today I should have just tossed the whole thing out the door and ordered pizza. Yes... that bad.
Dinner was done an hour ago and I was scared at how badly the fiasco affected me, so I sat down here at my laptop and started thinking. Said to myself: "Michael... wtf... it's one meal... let it go."
I could not let it go. Still can't, but I'm beginning to understand... I think. I have the same strong connection to my food and cooking as I do to my forest. Both are integral parts of me... in fact they ARE who I am.
I express myself, my feelings and my love through my cooking. Corny as that may seem, it is absolutely true.
Food is love.
I disappointed myself today... I disappointed the woman I love... and my reaction was quite a surprise. What I realized was just how deep my connection is to food and cooking.
When I revived the blog in February of 2023 and shared dishes with online friends and food groups, people told me I was good enough to be a chef. Until then, I had reserved said title for those men and women who worked commercial brigades in 110 degree kitchens with insane hours and stresses. I started to call myself Chef Michael R.... with a bit of a smirk, to be honest.
Tonight I looked at my 125 or so recipes, my countless hours spent in my kitchen singing, dancing, cooking, smiling and feeling safe. I realized that there is more to being a chef than my previous philosophy allowed. Just like my son Steven can compose music and literally see and hear the various parts of the orchestra in his head, so can I see and taste flavor combinations in mine.
I see flavors and I feel food. It is a part of me that is cherished beyond measure. My knife skills may not be blazing fast, but I can cook a damn good restaurant quality meal and my plating skills are getting better every day. I'm also learning every time I interact with my fellow foodies, and I love that part.
Going forward I will wear the title of Chef with pride... and next time I mess up as badly as I did tonight, I'll know better, swallow my pride and order pizza.
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Have a great week, everyone, and thank you for your support!
Blessed be… and happy cooking!
Chef Michael R